


Why'd You Leave?

by Broken_Twisted_Lullabies



Series: Why'd You Leave? [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Abandonment, Angst, Blasphemy, Chuck is God, Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Gabriel has a lot of anger pent up, God's a Dick, Loki!Gabriel, Pre-Series, Swearing, Trickster!Gabriel, part 2 in the making
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-29
Updated: 2016-07-29
Packaged: 2018-07-27 14:15:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,994
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7621624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Broken_Twisted_Lullabies/pseuds/Broken_Twisted_Lullabies
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gabriel, spending a lonely night at a bar, runs into someone from his past life. The only issue? Chuck isn't exactly whom he leads Gabriel on to believing he is.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Why'd You Leave?

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by the song, "Found Me" by the Fray. This is my head cannon why Gabriel was so bitter and cruel up until the ending of Changing Channels/ Hammer of the Gods, stemming from what his Father said to him. Super angsty and based off slightly to conversation between Metatron and God in 11.20- Don’t Call Me Shurley.  
> Warning: Gabriel talks badly about Catholics/ God as well as swears a lot.

It was fun being Loki and the Trickster, screwing with assholes that needed just desserts and having no care in the world. Anything he wanted, he had: women, candy, alcohol, you name it; he had it in a snap of his fingers. And best of all, the longer Gabriel remained the pagan deity, the less he became the Archangel he was. Heaven had been pushed so far down along with his grace as Gabriel lived out the rest of creation on his Father’s creation until the end of time. He no family – not anymore – nor did he have to follow his “Father’s orders” (which he knew was bullshit as his Eldest brother, Michael, was the one ruling Heaven since dear old dad ditched).

As much as Gabriel loved being Loki though, an ache still followed him wherever he went. From the phantom feel of his now hidden wings to the aching silence in his head, part of him did wish he was home. His real home, Heaven, not this place he claimed as his new home. But he couldn’t return, no matter how much he the pain was because the home he wanted to return to was long gone.

He snorted; lifting the bottle to his lips and feeling the alcohol run down his throat. It barely burned going down – the perks of an Archangel, he’d grumble – and looked around the half empty bar.

“Rough day?” the bartender asked, noting the ex-Archangel’s dull expression.

Rough day wasn’t even the tip of the iceberg. Try rough millennia at least. “Yeah, you could say that,” he chuckled dryly, putting the bottle down. “Nothing I’m not used to though,” he shrugged.

The bartender nodded. “You wanna talk?” he asked, used to hearing the complaints of his other customers about horrible bosses, cheating spouses, and everything in between.

“Believe me, if I had any clue where to start, you’d never be able to sit long enough to hear the end,” Gabriel joked, a smirk appearing on his lips.

“Fair enough. Brief summarization?”

Gabriel took another swig of his beer, thinking. “Shitty family. Fighting, abandonment, the whole shabam.”

The bartender looked sympathetic. “Yikes,” he exclaimed and Gabriel nodded, giving a half shrug. “Sounds pretty horrible.”

“You don’t know the half of it,” the trickster laughed. “What I just said makes it seem like every other day.” He then stands up, placing some cash on the bar. “Thanks for the beer.”

Just then, the door is flung open and he freezes as something powerful washed over him. Slowly turning around, he sees a rather scruffy man enter the bar and sit down beside him.

“Whiskey, bartender,” the stranger says with a tired look on his face. The bartender nods, disappearing to go and get the drink.

Gabriel finds himself sitting down once more, eyes on the man beside him and unable to speak. Although he looked like an ordinary human, Gabriel felt a power hanging in the air the moment the stranger walked into the bar. At first Gabriel had thought that maybe it was another pagan god, but due to the fact the man had yet to recognize him, Gabriel ruled that out. He was quite well known amongst the pagans and the odds of not being recognized where nearly impossible. Ruling out deity – and monster as well since there was no strange stench emitting from him – Gabriel was left with very few options. It had to been an angel but Gabriel knew he was the only heavenly being to set foot on the earth for thousands of years.

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” the man beside him comments, noticing Gabriel’s strange look. “You, uh, okay?”

The Trickster blinked, nodding. “Yeah uh…” he chuckled. “Sorry, thought you were someone else,” he admitted. “Name’s Michael,” Gabriel easily lied. He loved to use his older brother’s names and do rather vulgar things in their names just to piss them off and show how much they had hurt him.

The man gave a small smile, “You don’t look like a Michael.”

Gabriel laughed, ordering another beer. “Really? I’ve gotten that only once.”

“The names Chuck Shurley,” the other man introduced.

Gabriel tried to think why the name might be familiar and then blanched. Shit. No wonder this human had a heavenly feel to him. He was a prophet. Clearing his throat and trying to remain cool, the archangel responded. “Nice to meet you Chuck. What’s got you doing in this fine establishment? Women, men, money?” He asks, hoping to not blow his cover and attract the attention of Heaven. Gabriel had been hiding for years and wasn’t going back just because Karma was a bitch and made him bump into a prophet of all things.

The bartender set down Chuck’s drink before walking away and the prophet took a big drink. Putting down the glass, he sighed. “Life.” Was all Chuck gave as an answer and Gabriel lift his beer in toast.

“Won’t argue there with ya, Chuckie,” he laughed, an almost bitter kind of laugh and took a swig of the drink. “Like what those poor saps that call themselves Catholics and drink away their sorrows outside the liquor store say: ‘God hates us and is laughing at the mess that is our lives.’”

Chuck frowned, looking at the pagan god. “You don’t believe in God?” he asked and Gabriel chuckled dryly.

“I’m more with the pagans than the Westerners with Christ and God and all that,” he admitted, the irony sweet. “Gives me the proof that at least some god out there cares instead of one big man causing only suffering for the bastards on this earth.” Sure, it was harsh, but Gabriel meant every word.

“I’m guessing with the bitterness you have for the religion, you were once Christian?” Chuck wondered aloud. “Sorry for jumping to conclusions, I didn’t mean-” He added quickly, noticing the dark expression grace Gabriel’s face.

Waving his hand, the Archangel in disguise shrugged. “That’s fine. And it’s a long story,” he gave a lopsided smirk, taking another drink of beer. Chuck nodded at Gabriel’s words.

The two of them continued to talk about little things and as the bar began to clear out; Chuck soon rose and put some cash on the bar top. “I have to go, but it was nice talking with you,” he said to Gabriel, a small smile on his face and the pagan nodded.

“See ya ‘round Chuckie,” he said to the prophet, glad that neither of his older brothers had shown up to find him chilling with a prophet of all people.

“See you around.” Chuck had practically made it to the door of the bar before turning and looking over his shoulder at Gabriel. “And take care, Gabriel.” He exited the bar and Gabriel’s jaw dropped, gold eyes wide.

_No, no. How the hell had the prophet figure it out? No. He…He had disguised his grace so well and yet… fuck._

“Chuck? Hey wait!” He called, snapping up some bills and rushing out the bar to find the prophet. Flinging open the bar, the Archangel searched around wildly for the other man, feeling his buried grace beginning to try to break free from fear. “Chuck! Where the fuck are you?”

* * *

Gabriel searched for the prophet for weeks because nothing made sense. He had been hidden for centuries, playing the trickster guise so well Gabriel often forgot he was older, more powerful than all of the gods he hung with, and yet one prophet in a bar manages to figure it out. To see right through Gabriel’s mask.

That didn’t sit well with the trickster and he spent his free time not screwing with others trying to find Chuck Shurley, who was not as easy to find as Gabriel had thought.

So when Gabriel accidentally bumped into the prophet, he almost didn’t realize it for a second.

“Oh, I’m so sorry, I didn’t see you there and-” The man began to ramble and Gabriel opened his mouth to respond before narrowing his eyes.

“Hello Chuck,” he said, grabbing the prophet’s collar and yanking him into the nearby alley way.

Fear instantly filled Chuck’s face and Gabriel felt the ground begin to shake. “Fuck. I won’t hurt you Chuck, okay?” he exclaimed, glancing up at the sky.

The prophet was still shaking, watching Gabriel with nervous eyes. “L-Look buddy, I’ll give you my wallet, whatever you want!” The rumbling got louder and a high pitch whine filled the air.

This wasn’t working! Gabriel knew one of his older brothers would be here and find him, hauling his ass back upstairs. “Just call off your guardian angels, ‘kay Chuckie? I won’t hurt you but the last thing I want is my ass smitten,” Gabriel told him, backing up with hands raised in an innocent gesture.

“G-Guardian angel? What are you talking about?”

Sighing, Gabriel snapped his fingers and transported the two of them to one of his many pocket dimensions before trouble arrived. Landing in a lavish living room, Chuck looked around wildly.

“How did we get here? We were just…” Eyes widening as he looked over at the pagan god, he scrambled backwards away from Gabriel. “What are you?”

“That’s rich, coming from you,” Gabriel snarled, advancing on Chuck and the prophet backed away from the pissed trickster. “I’ve been hiding for _centuries_ , been Loki so long, dishing out just desserts, and yet somehow a crummy little prophet knows my real name. So why don’t you tell me what the hell are _you_?” Gabriel was almost chest to chest with Chuck now, eyes blazing and the air was crackling with anger. “’Cause there is no way in hell that a prophet is smarter than a bunch of pagan gods and angels,” he spat.

The prophet swallowed, “Look, I thought your name was Gabriel, that’s it!”

“I told you it was Michael but when you said goodbye, you called me Gabriel.”

“It was an honest mistake buddy! Look, I’m just- I’m just an ordinary guy and-”

Gabriel rolled his eyes. “Bull shit. Cut the crap Chuck. I’m not in a playing mood at the moment.”

Nodding quickly, Chuck gulped. “Okay, look Michael – or do you want me to call you Gabriel?”

“Loki works,” Gabriel told him and the prophet nodded.

“Okay. Okay, so there was something a bit off about you when we first met and I just-” the nervous behaviour didn’t seem to soften Gabriel’s attitude and the prophet sighed, taking a step back. “This isn’t gonna work, huh?” he chuckled, dropping the fearful expression in an instant.

Even if Gabriel was surprised, he didn’t let Chuck see it. “No, it’s not. So why don’t you tell me who you really are,” he growled, still keeping up the righteous anger and Chuck gave the trickster a soft smile.

“You know who I am, Gabriel.”

“I do? And who might that be?” Gabriel asked, quirking an eyebrow and cross his hands across his chest. “Because no prophets are as powerful as you are and I doubt a pagan would hide as one.”

Chuck nodded, “that’s true. I’m not a prophet, per say, but you are right about hiding as one.” Chuckling, he watched the Archangel with warm, kind eyes. “Running away from home and becoming someone you aren’t, where’d you get that idea, kiddo?”

Gabriel’s eyes widen before narrowing. “What’s that supposed to mean?” he asked. “And how the hell do you know if I ran away?”

“Just because I left didn’t mean I stopped watching all my children, Gabriel,” Chuck admitted.  “But I have to say, of all the things you could’ve pretended to be to hide from your brothers, a pagan god wasn’t on my list.”

Now it was Gabriel’s turn to be confused and he tilted his head. “Your children? But…” His sentence trailed off and Gabriel went ridged as he realized who stood before him. “Dad?” he gasped, taking a step back.

Chuck smiled and nodded. “Yes, my son.” When He tried to move closer to Gabriel, the trickster flinched and shied away from His touch. “Gabriel…”

“You left us,” Gabriel said to his Father. “You left us without any warning!” God heard His son’s voice crack and sighed.

“I did, didn’t I? But I had to do it, Gabriel, you must understand.”

“Oh I understand. You walked out on us after throwing your favourite son in Hell,” Gabriel spat and God shook his head.

“Gabriel, my boy,” He began and earned an icy glare from the Archangel.

“You lost the right to call me your son when you ditched us,” he said. “Raphael thought you were dead and I nearly believed him! I thought it would be better if you just came home, but now, I see it would’ve been better if you were dead.”

God looked at his hurt child, shocked. “Gabriel, please, listen to me.”

“No, you listen to me. You. Left. Us. Michael tore himself apart trying to figure out what he did to cause Daddy to leave him. He blamed Lucifer for this! You bastard! You wrecked everything!” Tears now began to form in Gabriel eyes and the Archangel was shaking. “We trusted you! We needed our Father and you showed us the middle finger and left without even telling us why!”

He turned away from his Father, not wanting himself to cry in front of Him because Gabriel knew he might just give in and run back to his parent.

“My Messenger, you must understand that nothing was getting any better with me in Heaven. My departure-”

“Created a war!” Gabriel finished. “Turned the angels into mindless soldiers, made Michael a heartless general and Raphael no different!” Looking back up at his Father, Gabriel swallowed a sob. “How was any of that good?” He asked, sounding so small and scared.

Moving towards His son, God tried to reach out and comfort Gabriel’s crying grace but the trickster never let him.

Gabriel reached up to wipe the tears on his cheeks with his jacket sleeve, teary gold eyes meeting his Father’s. “I-I looked for you. When I r-r-ran away, I searched e-everywhere, hoping to convince you to come home but a-after… _years_ , I just listened to Raph… I-I believed you were d-d-dead.” He shook his head, hurt in his gaze. “But it turns out you were hiding as a human and watching as shit hit the fan without any care.

“Why’d you do it, huh?” Gabriel hiccupped.

“Why did I leave?” God clarified and Gabriel nodded, wrapping his arms around himself, looking much smaller and no longer like a powerful being but a little boy whose Father abandoned him. “It was because you disappointed me,” He stated bluntly with a sigh, causing Gabriel to stumble backwards as if he was hit.

“W-What?” The ex-Archangel looked at his Father, hurt and confused.

God frowned, looking at His son. “All of you were such disappointments,” He explained and Gabriel gave a flinch at those words.

All at once, everything crumbled around Gabriel as he realize the Father he had tried to look for, didn’t want him.

The Creator looked like He was going to speak once more but Gabriel narrowed his tear filled eyes, hands clenched in fists. “Fuck you!” He yelled, voice wavering. “You selfish bastard! We were your children! We _prayed_ to you!”

“And I heard them.”

Gabriel glared at Him. “But you didn’t fucking answer them.”

He shrugged, not happy. “Why should I always have to do everything for you angels? Why should whenever something went wrong, you ran to me and expected Daddy to fix all your problems?” God asked and Gabriel let out a growl.

“Because that’s what Fathers do! They _help_ their fucking children, not walk out on them when they most need them!” Gabriel shouted back, ground shaking.

“You needed to learn to grow up for once,” God retorted, losing his temper at the youngest Archangel, who in turn gave a humourless chuckle, eyes blazing.

“And what, pray tell, did you try to teach us? Because all we learned is our Dad was a deadbeat who didn’t give a rat’s ass about us.” Gabriel felt the air crackling around the two of them and he snorted. “Some lesson you taught us. You didn’t even step in when angels began to slaughter each other! No, instead you spent your time sitting on your ass, drinking!”

This caused Him to snap and within an instant, He was towering over Gabriel, power radiating off Him. Gabriel, although smaller and not even close to as powerful as his Father didn’t flinch, standing his ground.

“Out of all the angels, I think you have disappointed me the most, Gabriel,” His voice boomed through the room, bouncing off the walls. “You took the cowardice way of running and hiding on Earth, as a pagan god of all things – calling yourself a _god_ , really? – Completely turning your back on your family and Heaven. And then mating and having offspring with giants?” The Creator looked down at His child, disgust, and disappointment etched on His face. “All of your brothers did well, but you, you were one of my mistakes, flawed,” He spat bitterly and the anger on Gabriel’s face disappeared, replaced with an expression of hurt.

“You are no Archangel.”

Gold eyes dropped to look at his feet and Gabriel felt his shoulders sag, sucking in a ragged breath. Then he straightens up, chest puffed out and chin high. “You’re right, Daddy-o. I’m not an Archangel. Gabriel? He died a while back. It’s Loki now,” he snarled, eyes no longer watery and filled with tears. His old life was gone, just like the Father he once had, and there was no returning to what it once was. A wolfish grin forms as he lifts his hand to snap away, saying, “I have no family. And definitely no Father.”

He vanished with a snap, the pocket dimension surrounding Chuck falling apart.


End file.
